When people discuss the fifteen minutes of fame, you never really realize that it is true. I often wonder if I have already had that moment, and in my stupidity it slipped out of my fingers. To be perfectly honest I think of this more often that I should, because really what friggin difference does it make, it truly only matters in my mind. Maybe it has something to do with the instant satisfaction I have in our industry. A Chef is rewarded with instant gratification of serving a meal that satisfy's a persons soul. Now I work for a large corporation, a machine, that dictates my every move. The constant battle that I am dealing with is that in my heart and soul I know the correct way to accomplish items, the proper way to prepare a sauce, the beyond proper way to develop and create a staff. Yet my hands are tied. I continue to sacrifice my personal commitment to excellence in order to make sure that we have our home. It is so narcisistic to think that my way is the right way, but I know it is the correct way. When I taste the sauces, and dishes and taste the levels of salt and sugar in these dishes I want to scream. Yet the machine will not let me. I am becoming frustrated with my lack of ability to effect the items around me. What is the point when I push the envelope and make sure that the items are fresh, and meet the specifications. Only to turn around and see someone else ignore them. How is that doing the right thing?
So here I sit at 3:30 am in the morning. less than 3 days away from turning 45 and I am still wondering why, why am I at this point and not above it?
Waiting for the next best thing..
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